What is that supposed to mean? Paper bags are brown and plastic bags are brown. History indicates that this term means paper bags, but why? The origins of the term date back decades when all bags were paper AND brown. So if a person wants a paper bag rather than a plastic bag they may say "I want brown bags" because..... .

1. Brown is easier to say than paper. It is only one syllable long as opposed to two.
   
2. Who cares if it is the 2000's. Back in the good old days we called them "brown bags" and we're not changing our ways just because some college punks came up with the idea of plastic bags.
   
3. It is fun to see who the rookies are. We will show them who is smart and who is not.
   
4. I'm bored and I need to create some witty conversation with the clerk.

Sometimes when they see their groceries bagged in plastic, they say "Oh, I want bags." What does that mean? Paper?

Sure you could use my 10 cent pen, but I am curious as to why you don't have your own? You brought along a bulky checkbook, but not a thin cheap pen which can easily be held inside of it. As it is, you're writing IOU's to people, but the burden is on them to provide you with a pen? Why don't you have a pen?

1. Hey! Don't be sarcastic. If you don't give me a pen now, I won't give you the opportunity to take an IOU from me in the future.
   
2. I loaned my pen to another customer to check off their shopping list while they shopped. It's ironic though. They put a lot of thought into writing a very detailed shopping list, but didn't even bother to bring the pen that they used to write the list along.

Physically anchor down that 10 cent pen so it can't be taken.

It's been tried but that STILL doesn't work. The pens still disappear. (What I want to know is where do the pens actually go?) If I had 1 cent for every pen that disappeared in a day, I would be richer than Bill Gates!

Webster's Dictionary reads "a day of freedom from labor; a day set aside for leisure and recreation". Also, "a day set aside by law or custom for the suspension of business, usually in celebration of some event".

Not in the retail industry. To some it should be business as usual. Most people recognize the fact that when they shop on a holiday, it is a holiday. For those arrogant 10% that do not recognize the fact.....

1. A holiday is a holiday for ALL Americans, not just you.
   
2. Go complain to the U.S. Postal Service that you didn't receive your mail on the holiday. Better yet, try to do this ON the holiday.
   
3. Get a whim to go open a bank account on the holiday, since YOU don't have to work.
   
4. You didn't know in advance that the day would be a holiday? You couldn't be prepared even though you've had 364 days to be ready?
   
5. Use common sense before you open your mouth. You and I both already know that you are self centered and selfish, but you don't have to prove it.

It's on the aisle under the sign that says "BREAD".

I'll show you. Just follow me.

If you can't find the sign that says "BREAD" or see 40 feet of bread on an aisle, what makes you think you can follow my directions? I'll just escort you to the aisle.

First of all, what are grits?

I'm sorry, but if you describe it to me, then, maybe, I can help you find it.

Well if it's such a staple food, then, you should know where it is. Besides, it sounds like you answered your own question. If it's similar to oatmeal, try the hot cereal section on the breakfast aisle Sherlock!

No I don't. I DID until 2 minutes ago when I signed out for the end of my shift, but why are you asking? Is it because:

1. I am NOT wearing a name badge indicating that I work here? or
2. The tie around my neck is UNTIED and hanging as if I were on my way home? or
3. I am OBVIOUSLY not working?

When you go through the checkstand, do you ask the checker if they "work here?" No, you don't because it is obvious. So why are you asking me?

"No I didn't."

(these are actual responses)

1. A million dollars.
   
2. The winning Lotto numbers.
   
3. A woman.
   
4. A new mother-in-law.

1. People pay with wet money.
2. When an item doesn't scan, the customer says "It must be free!!". I always have the urge to congratulate them for being so original.
3. "Are you open?" No, that's why my aisle light is off, I have a CLOSED sign on my belt, a chain across my check stand, and a merchandising rack barricading my lane.

1. "I thought karaoke was a food".
2. "I want a combo." Pardon me? "I want a combo!" I'm sorry, but what is a combo? "PAPER IN PLASTIC!!!" (In 15 years, this was the first time I heard "paper in plastic" referred to as a "combo")

1. Greeting cards are always preceded on the checkstand belt with wet items, such as frozen food and produce?
2. People wait until their merchandise is rung up, bagged, and placed into their cart before they even begin to look for their checkbook?
3. Customers put stuff they brought from home, like a kids toy, on the checkstand belt along with their groceries. When the checker picks it up, they say "Excuse me! We brought that from home!" Well why did you put it on the belt you moron?

• "The Owl" - 123 Dear Worker and Your Medicare Dollar
• "The Owl" - BR N64