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GlassManMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: Sep. 21 2009,7:37 am Post # 1 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

This is supposed to be an actual letter.  I don't know if it is, but it's hysterical.


Ding, ding, ding!  Winner!
 
ACTUAL PASSPORT LETTER-----HILARIOUS!

This letter is a thing of beauty (even if the language is a bit rough)..
You definitely feel the guy's pain! An actual letter to the passport
office...

Dear sirs,

I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.  How is it that Radio Shack has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a cable t.v. from them back in 1987, and yet, the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date.

For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand? My birth date you have on my social security card, and it is on all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 30 years. It is on my health insurance card, my driver's license, on the last eight damn passports I've had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off the plane over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are done at election times.

Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name is Maryanne, my father's name is Robert and I'd be absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and when I die!!!!!!

I apologize, I'm really pissed off this morning. Between you an' me, I've had enough of this bullshit! You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my f----in' address.

What is going on?  You have a gang of Neanderthal assholes workin' there!  

Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden?  I don't want to dig up Yasser Arafat, for $hiat sakes. I just want to go and park my ass on a sandy beach.

And would someone please tell me, why would you give a $hiat whether I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge to do something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I'd sure as hell not want to tell anyone!

Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other end of the city and get another f----in' copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of $60. Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day?? Nooooo, that'd be too damn easy and maybe makes sense.  You'd rather have us running all over the f---in' place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some asshole to confirm that it's really me on the damn picture - you know,the one where we're not allowed to smile?! (bureaucratic f---in' morons)  Hey, you know why we can't smile?  We're totally pissed off!


Signed
- An Irate Citizen.


P.S.. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting someone to confirm that it's me?  Well, my family has been in this country since 1776 ........I have served in the military for something over 30 years and have had security clearances up the yingyang.........However, I have to get someone 'important' to verify who I am - you know, someone like my doctor WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN INDIA  !

Sincerely,

You Sure In The Hell Should Know Who.

......................And we want them to run our health care?!?


It's a fact of Life:

After Monday and Tuesday, even the Calendar says : WTF .......
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Post Icon Posted: Sep. 21 2009,7:40 am Post # 2 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Seen that quite a while ago, that is a good one!.. :laugh  :good
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Post Icon Posted: Sep. 21 2009,8:16 am Post # 3 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

:laugh  :laugh  All too true though.  :rolleyes


"It seemed like a hell of an idea at the time".
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Post Icon Posted: Sep. 21 2009,12:08 pm Post # 4 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

:laugh That's Funny, And It's Too True!!


Sarcasim, Just one more thing that I offer for free!!
I've Reached The Age Where Happy Hour Is A Nap!!

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GlassManMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: Sep. 23 2009,7:10 am Post # 5 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Another one I got the other day about the lengths pharmaceutical companies go to to advertise their products..

Been in an exam room lately? They put logos on everything!

Here's a good one:


A Chinese doctor e-mailed back: 'If the light stays on for more than 4 hours, call your "erectrician.'"

Attached Image
Attached Image


It's a fact of Life:

After Monday and Tuesday, even the Calendar says : WTF .......
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Post Icon Posted: Sep. 23 2009,7:11 am Post # 6 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Quote (GlassMan @ Sep. 23 2009,7:10 am)
Another one I got the other day about the lengths pharmaceutical companies go to to advertise their products..

Been in an exam room lately? They put logos on everything!

Here's a good one:


A Chinese doctor e-mailed back: 'If the light stays on for more than 4 hours, call your "erectrician.'"

:rotflmao  :rotflmao


"It seemed like a hell of an idea at the time".
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GlassManMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: Oct. 02 2009,7:30 am Post # 7 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

This e-mail originated in  Scotland  .
Is the entire world laughing at our nation's leadership?  Seems so…

Attached Image
Attached Image


It's a fact of Life:

After Monday and Tuesday, even the Calendar says : WTF .......
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DirtySquirtyMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: Oct. 02 2009,9:59 am Post # 8 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Quote (GlassMan @ Oct. 02 2009,7:30 am)
This e-mail originated in  Scotland  .
Is the entire world laughing at our nation's leadership?  Seems so…

:laugh  :good


"It seemed like a hell of an idea at the time".
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Post Icon Posted: Oct. 02 2009,10:15 am Post # 9 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Today he was in Copenhagen, looks like they laughed at him too. I'm still trying to find out what kind of personal guarantee he was trying to sell to the Olympic Commitee. Does he really think he'll be Pres. in 2016. :beat


"Damn you sure know how to fock things up."-GFR
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GlassManMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: Oct. 02 2009,11:22 am Post # 10 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Hey, it all worked out in the end....he was trying to get the Olympics in Chicago...My wife called and told me they dropped that idea like a hot potato and finally went with Las Vegas.  :good

That should be fun, we get a discount at the Rio.  :beer


It's a fact of Life:

After Monday and Tuesday, even the Calendar says : WTF .......
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GoFastRacerMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: Oct. 05 2009,6:20 am Post # 11 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Quote (GlassMan @ Oct. 02 2009,11:22 am)
Hey, it all worked out in the end....he was trying to get the Olympics in Chicago...My wife called and told me they dropped that idea like a hot potato and finally went with Las Vegas.  :good

That should be fun, we get a discount at the Rio.  :beer

Ahemmm!.. :D

http://www.olympic.org/en....6-Games
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DirtySquirtyMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: Oct. 05 2009,6:49 am Post # 12 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Quote (GoFastRacer @ Oct. 05 2009,6:20 am)
Quote (GlassMan @ Oct. 02 2009,11:22 am)
Hey, it all worked out in the end....he was trying to get the Olympics in Chicago...My wife called and told me they dropped that idea like a hot potato and finally went with Las Vegas.  :good

That should be fun, we get a discount at the Rio.  :beer

Ahemmm!.. :D

http://www.olympic.org/en....6-Games

:laugh  :rotflmao


"It seemed like a hell of an idea at the time".
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GlassManMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: Oct. 05 2009,10:59 am Post # 13 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Oh...


...nevermind  :confused


It's a fact of Life:

After Monday and Tuesday, even the Calendar says : WTF .......
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